19 November 2011


we all have the tendency to make snap judgements with one quick view into a stranger's life. whether or not the intent is malicious, i think this is a bad habit we all succumb to from time to time. this is something i have been striving to change about myself because once you start rolling down the hill with judgement, it can quickly turn into comparison and then your joy and delight in your very own fabulous little life can get lost easily.

to help combat this, i turn things inside out and remind myself what my story can often look like from someone viewing it beyond the borders.

from the outside, we surely looked like a disaster of a family at barnes and noble tonight.

from the outside, we were a little family of three at the bookstore. from the outside i'm sure several people made the judgement i was a teenage mom, due to my short stature and delicate baby face. from the outside, i was a momma who looked exhausted beyond all measure, no makeup, hair thrown back into a messy bun. a way too cute headband plunked on top of the haphazard strands, in an effort to regain a piece of my once always perfectly accessorized self. from the outside, sookie was a curious toddler running around, creating havoc in every corner she landed, ac/dc shirt, red pants, mismatched striped pink and teal sweatshirt and crazy red hair falling in her eyes approximately every 2.3 seconds.

from the inside? from the inside we are a family who has already beat so many odds, but that doesn't mean it gets easier to accept the tough news. from the inside we are a strong family who knows how boundless love is and how many oceans we would swim through in order to get to each other. from the inside we are a family who is tired. a family who spent the better part of their week at NIH trudging through test after test after test. from the inside, i am a momma who looks very young, but had to grow up quickly. a momma who has been thinking about her own mortality since she was four years old. a momma who wants nothing else in the universe than to be able to protect her daughter forever. from the inside there is a toddler who can sense her momma's fear and showers her in hugs and an abundance of kisses. from the inside, i can tell you that rory is the most incredible man i will ever meet; a daddy who goes above and beyond at every opportunity he gets and a life partner who never signed up for any of this, but who jumps feet first into whatever life has next for us, loving me through it all with a fierceness so tender, it makes me ache.


  1. I remember being judgemental -love how the word "mental" is in there- about people's parenting skills or my perceived lack thereof. I just knew MY kids wouldn't act like that. Little.Did.I.Know. Now I find that the most judge"mental" are the ones without kids. Now when I see someone with a kid that's all over and into everything, I am most likely to say, "hi. Don't sweat it, my kids nutso too." And for the ones that judge, that's their problem and I will most likely NEVER see them again so WHO CARES what they think? Love you and your adorable, wonderful, crazy miracle family.

  2. I love this post, and that Walt Whitman quote. :)

  3. http://amothersmosey.blogspot.com/2011/11/arent-we-so-quick-to-judge.html

    so, i love your post, i posted about the same/a similar thing earlier!

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