10 July 2011

precipice


 

times they are a-changing, my friends.

(& not just because i'm awake at 3 a.m. packing) 

something is brewing in a far off place, ready to take our lives by storm and turn them upside down. in a good way. i get this sense when things start to morph into something new before i am ready. maybe this is due to all these summer rainstorms we have been experiencing lately. perhaps it is because later this week sookie will meet the doctor who studied our placenta. (which i think is a giant great big event to celebrate!) or maybe i'm simply saying this because i'm stressed about the notion of a very long road trip with our very strong willed 17 month old. (ha!)

in june i challenged myself to finish her birth story and also to put up that polaroid heart in our front room. decorate the wall with some of our favorite moments, frozen in time. i failed to accomplish either task. but you know what? i'm not giving up. i will finish the birth story in july. this month. i've been struggling with being honest with my feelings about that day and during my pregnancy, but sometimes it is very painful to revisit that time. i was scared. i was fearing the worst. i felt worse than i did when i was in end stage renal failure. of course the story has a happy ending, but some of it is really dark and i'm trying to figure out how to weave the light & the hope in with the fear. without sounding completely insane, of course.

i can't help but feel like i'm on the brink of something & i'm so excited to see what it is. 

apologies if i sound crazy in this post; it is much too late (early?) and i'm thinking too much. 



can't believe it is sunday again already!

much love!

2 comments:

  1. Can you send some of that rain my way? Haha! Don't worry about the birth story - I'm the same way with getting my scrapbook done. I want to finish this one before I do my wedding one, but getting started is the hard part! :D

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  2. time really does fly! i've learned to take things day by day... it will get done!

    :)

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