11 Months

At 11 months, you are still an itty bitty girl. I love it because you are so small , nevertheless mighty. Your strength amazes me everyday; how strong you are when you decide to take hold of mommy and daddy's headboard and how tough you were to make it here.

You and I had a conversation in the kitchen the other day. I was eating pickles (imagine that) whilst holding you. I told you how happy I am that you are here and how excited I am to be your mommy. I told you how brave I think you are because I genuinely believe it was your bravery and grace that carried me through the pregnancy. I told you how sorry I am that I wasn't more positive during the whole journey while you were growing inside of me, it was simply that I was worried. I had no idea what to expect or even prepare for. Yet I think you knew all along you were going to blaze all these new trails and break all the rules. I think you knew it with your whole being, even in my darkest moments when I stopped believing I would ever get to meet you outside of the womb.

Whew. I'm okay, really. Usually I don't bombard you with heavy talks like that. Today I simply felt I needed to.

You probably think I am a little wacko for these talks and then the dance parties we have in the kitchen half an hour later. You might be catching on to the fact, that is how we live around here.

These days you are always going full speed ahead and I think your goal every second is to see how fast you can splash out all of the water in jacks dog dish. I realize you are an Aquarius, but girl you are obsessed with the water bowl. And his dog food too. I think you would eat it for every meal if you could.

Things mama is actually letting you eat lately? Toast with butter, cucumbers, olives, sweet potatoes, black beans, pickles, cheese, pasta, oh you have a weakness for pasta like I do. You also love tomatoes still and avocados. It is a fun new journey watching you eat more adult food. I want to just squeeze you when I notice your tiny little fingers picking up your food, your movements are so delicate and purposeful.

Last week, we started switching you over from formula to organic whole milk. This is a bittersweet step for me because it signals you are upcoming on your second year here in this beautiful, and yet crazy world, but I am also so relieved because not being able to breastfeed has been a battle emotionally.

You have many new toys from Christmas. We have so much fun pretending in your little kitchen and daddy and I always seem to get the most obnoxious songs stuck in our heads. I revel in your curiosity in how the world works; what shampoo bottles are, what the toilet is, what my shoes taste like. I think the world would be more alive if everyone had your curiosity and held onto it.

You love everyone's teeth, mommy's shoes, and clapping. You clap a lot and with such determination.

For Christmas Santa brought you a tent for your room that resembles a tree; we put some play balls in there too and you finally love it. (I think your fun cousin Kenley helped you realize how much fun you can have in there!)

A few days ago, we were playing, you pretended to comb my hair with your toy comb and I burst into tears. Little moments like these I've had over the years with the sweet kids I have been a nanny to, but when they are with you I just burst with sheer awe of the reality we are having these mommy/daughter moments. I'm a little bit emotional these days, can you tell?

Physically you are a champ when it comes to crawling. You are so speedy, I often wonder if you sneak my diet coke when I'm not looking. We have to keep the door to the bathroom closed because you think the toilet is fascinating. You like to walk when holding onto both of someone's hands or when you have the crutch of your walker to aid you. I'm perfectly fine with this. I'm not in a hurry to have you walk!

You are full of chatter, sometimes we can even understand what you are saying. In addition to the ever present "momma" and "dada", you have started calling Glamma something similar to momma, but it is slightly different and you only say it when she is around. You continue to say puppy a lot (for Jack, well and other dogs as well), sometimes you say poop, bye bye, book, and I swear today you said nap, but perhaps that was wishful thinking and a fluke. ;)

You love to take the clothes out of the dryer as I am putting them in.

You can understand the concept of what a kiss entails. In fact, last night you ripped off daddy's glasses and then gave him a big kiss. I missed it but the way daddy describes it to me makes me melt with love for the both of you.

These monthly posts of your growth and development always tend to be my longest ones. Hmmm, I wonder why? It couldn't possible be because momma falls more and more in love with you every single minute and that you are pretty much my favorite human being ever.