our love is

I say...

Love is: throwing all caution to the wind & going on a date after an awful breakup. Love is: Starbucks, mountains in the distance & the thrilling goosebumps of meeting someone who will change your life forever. Love is: fun, mischief, butterflies, & only weeks after meeting, a man who boldly tells me "our love story will be the greatest ever told!" Love is: falling for a girl with a crazy fatal illness and loving her through the years with reckless abandon. Love is: going to every single doctor appointment & being an absolute rock despite the fact you are petrified of losing your girl and your unborn daughter. Love is: strings of "I love yous" in a labor and delivery room in the face of the crippling pain and blissful magic of childbirth. Love is: teaching this girl how to truly LIVE and dance to the mantra of "may the best of your todays be the worst of your tomorrows." ♥

He says...


Love is being yourself in front of the one you love, to be truly transparent. Love is being able to fart (we all do). Love is spending every last dime to experience life and enjoy it why we have it. Love is seeing beyond outer layers and truly caring what's inside. Love is pretending to like frozen pizza for the first 4 months. Love is the only thing you can give that won't take. Love is free and abundant. Love is having a migraine and letting someone release tension by beating the hell out of some drums. Love is for the moments of now and knowing but not worries about the trials that tomorrow will bring.

4 years

{A letter to my love}

If 4 years ago, some crazy fortune teller lady with purple hair (yes, of course she would have purple hair) had come up to me and told me where we would be today, I would have laughed and laughed and then probably laughed some more. If she would have said I would be spending my days raising our daughter and you would be working your little creative heart out developing iPhone apps for Appdicted, I would probably have asked her, "and what alternate universe is this?" Four years ago all that is a reality now seemed so far away, but I caught a glimpse of just how possible it all actually was. And that is probably why I was so scared to make that leap of faith with you.

{This photo quality is lacking, but I adore this one. It was our first Christmas together in 2006}

I still remember the sweet words you wrote in the first Christmas card you ever gave me, just 3 short months after we first met. I knew then that I was going to spend forever with you. We have been through so many lifetimes worth of struggles in the past 4 years, that it is a whirlwind to think about and attempt to process it all.

We have learned so much from each other over these past 4 years and I am grateful for every embrace, lesson, every fight, every good day, every single day, even the bad ones because it was the path that was leading us to where we are now. Our little family that I have always wanted, since the days of playing with my cabbage patch dolls, and yet never thought would come to fruition. 

You stuck with me through the last tough semesters when I was nearly ready to give up on my degree and college education. I don't know how we managed through the stress of all of this in our tiny one bedroom apartment. I also don't know why you chose to purchase Rockband right around the time of my very last finals. ;)

{We look like kids! May 2008}

  

We have done a lot of tailgating in the past 4 years and have been to many Utes football games.

We've been on lots of fun trips over the past 4 years; New York multiple times, San Antonio, Vegas, Jackson Hole.

It seems like yesterday I was worrying about the very real truth that we would never have biological children. I remember one night when we were driving to my parents, I told you how much it made my heart ache that my parents would never have grandchildren with their genes.

And look at us now. I know pregnancy is hard on a couple, even when everything is "normal" and things turn out wonderfully in the end. I was such a ball of stress and so worried, and yet even up against our very real concerns and logical fears, you always had optimism; even on the darkest days.

I know this summer has been a major adjustment for both of us, but I also know we are doing a wonderful job and our daughter is full of joy and she knows with every ounce of her being how much she is loved.

Thank you for not paying for my Starbucks the first time we met. Thank you for owning 'Tremors'. Thank you for apogee M&M's. Thank you for strawberry margaritas in a restaurant in Texas where Christmas exploded and understanding the importance of purchasing "The Deathly Hallows" exactly at midnight. Thank you for ALF marathons and a second date that lasted a long time. Thank you for your contagious optimism. Thank you for loving to shop as much as I do, and yet loving football as well.

& thank you for making a miracle with me.